Motivations

Scattered thoughts

Lorde’s new album has finally graced our ears and I’m currently on my third listen. It always takes a while for me, with her music. I remember distinctly hating Green Light when I first heard it – “I know about what you did, I want to scream the truth / she thinks you love the beach, you’re such a damn liar” like get over yourself, woman. It doesn’t sound vaguely coherent or even rhyme. But Green Light is my jam now.

I can’t relate to the literal theme — the album is really a heartbreak post-mortem — but the larger idea of trying to get over a particular heart pain, I would like to think, is universal. It hit me when the chorus of Green Light came through. I’m waiting for it, that green light, I want it. You know you need to get over it. You want to get over it. But it’s not easy.

Andy Warhol drew a penis to be sent to the moon

Things I did

On Tuesday, I went to the ArtScience Museum with Ding which was significant because 1. this was the third time I proper left the house since finals ended, and also because 2. I hadn’t seen her in close to 6 months.

It hasn’t been long since I last stepped into a museum but I almost forgot how much I loved these places. We went for Future World (pretty but a little too peripheral) and the current one called The Universe and Art, which I really enjoyed because I am a fan of astronomy even if I don’t know much about it.

I also recently acquired an iPhone 7 so the novelty of live photos have not yet died on me. I turned some of them into gifs and now my photos move a la those newspapers in Harry Potter!

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Ding dong merrily on high!

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Once, when I was at a similar exhibition on astronomy, I saw an armillary sphere that modelled Ptolemy’s world system. Fresh off the heels of a complete setback and longing for some signs from the universe, I came across this:

This armillary sphere is constructed according to the world system described by the ancient mathematician Ptolemy. The earth is at the centre of the universe, surrounded by the great circles of the heavens, with the sun’s path represented by the broad band covered with the signs of the zodiac. Ptolemy’s model could account for all the movements of the heavens observable with the naked eye and his description of the universe was maintained for 2,000 years.

In 1543, the Polish astronomer Nicolaus Copernicus proposed a model of the universe with the sun at the centre, challenging the Ptolemaic model’s dominance. Shakespeare’s generation came of age in a world where, if the earth could move, perhaps anything could be challenged. 

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Looking forward to our next day out which hopefully will not be in another 6 months x

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Scattered thoughts

It’s been two and a half weeks since the semester ended and I’m well into my summer break, which so far has included me trying to get back on track with exercise (signed myself up for the StanChart 10km again, so there’s that), trying to read more, and trying to cure myself of this nasal congestion that has plagued me since last week. I really fall sick too easily.

On running: I don’t know why but I can run longer and further on the road then on the treadmill, which I thought would be vice versa. Even Google tells me that running on the treadmill is easier, but I suppose everyone’s body is wired differently. Or maybe because it is so much easier to slow down your pace when you are on the road, compared to manually jabbing the treadmill button and feeling depressed when you have to go down from a 8.7 to 8.3 thinking you are a freaking loser.

I also feel like going out for a run but the sky looks overcast but maybe I’m just creating excuses for myself LOL.

On reading: I’ve been contemplating to put a reservation on Bad Feminist (which I really want to read) at the library, but that would mean a $1.88 reservation fee that I am stingy to part. Then again, this is still cheaper than buying the actual book. Putting that on hold, I’m currently reading Lenin’s Kisses by Yan Lianke. I’m only about 50 pages in, but so far it looks promising. It’s about a rural village in China and how one particular official decides to use the villagers to raise money to buy Lenin’s embalmed corpse to become a tourist attraction. So far my favourite character has to be Grandma Mao Zhi, where this particular bit just killed me:

And the winter that the government tried to make everyone in Liven pay two pounds of cotton in taxes, wasn’t it Grandma Mao Zhi who’d removed her cotton jacket and thrown it in their faces and then, standing before them with her sagging breasts, demanded indignantly, “Is this enough? If not, I’ll also take off my pants,” and before they could react had begun to unfasten her belts?

The officials had exclaimed, “Grandma Mao Zhi, what on earth are you doing?” 

She’d waved her crutch at the. “If you want to collect cotton, I’ll take off my cotton pants right here and now, and hand them to you.”

The officials had dodged her crutches and departed.

Opinion on things

Inane

On music: The La La Land soundtrack would be so much more enjoyable if they actually got properly trained performers to sing it. A Lovely Night was akin to sandpapering my ears. And no, I’m not saying I can sing better (or sing at all) but you don’t see me getting paid to do something I’m not good at right? I would think the same standards should apply universally.

On coffee: I specifically asked for kopi siew dai peng but the drinks stall lady just poured the pre-made kopi into a cup of ice. I wasn’t giving you a choice, auntie.

On professors who promised to upload their midterm review to aid our revision for finals but it’s less than 24 hours to the paper and still nothing: I’m not saying I hate you, but if you were on fire and I had water, I’d drink it.

FYI

Thinking about things

Things didn’t work out because, well, greater things were in the works. It’s so difficult while we’re blind and hurting and don’t know which way is up. But, if you have faith in anything, have faith in the fact that the universe has a beautiful way of straightening things out far better than we ever could. You may not see it today or tomorrow, but you will look back in a few years and be absolutely perplexed and awed by how every little thing added up and brought you somewhere wonderful– or where you always wanted to be. You will be grateful that things didn’t work out the way you once wanted them to.

What Happens After What Was “Supposed To Be”